49, A true story

Two young women, who look approximately 16 (although they are, in fact, several years older), board the 49 bus at the front. After waving their bus passes at the Indian, doo-ragged bus driver, they make their way to the closest available seats. A drunken, chubby man sings in an unrecognizable language to a non-responsive, bearded hobo.

Girl 1: The 49 is always full of crazies. Me and the 49 go way back.

Girl 2 looks out the window as snow continues to fall from the sky. The bus stops again, and a toothless, but clean beggar enters the bus. He seats himself across from the two girls.

Toothless man: Can you help me out for a hamburger? I'm so hungry, I just want a hamburger.

The girls offer him some sweet and sour chicken, which he takes with pleasure. The drunken, chubby man is now on the floor at the front of the bus. The bus driver shakes the slumbering man.

Driver: If you don't sit in your chair, you have to leave the bus.

The drunken man, still on the floor howls at the driver. Eventually, he sits in his chair, but continues shouting.

Drunken man: You mother fucking Indian! Mother fucker. MOTHER! FUCKER! INDIAN!

The driver telephones the police. Several new characters enter the bus. A girl with a black dog, some hipsters, a dirty looking boy with dreadlocks and a guitar. A man with a carry cage. Everyone starts to get angry as they wait for the police to arrive. Finally, two police cars swerve around the corner. A murmur of satisfaction comes from the bus, until they realize the cars are turning in the wrong direction.

Girl 1 turns around to see, to her surprise, that the man with the carry cage has removed a gray rabbit from the cage and is now evilly stroking it. The rabbit is poking its head out from the neck of the man's hoodie.

Rabbit man: They went the wrong way! They must be Republican!

The driver gets off the bus to find the police.

Rabbit man: They must be Republican!

A police officer and the Sheriff enter the scene. They seem confused about who is causing the trouble. One man with very crooked teeth stands up and points in the drunken man's direction.

Crooked Teeth man: That's him! That's him, officer!

The police officers take the drunken man away. The boy with the guitar starts playing a song in celebration. The bus does not move for several more minutes since the driver has to file a report with the police. In the meantime, another 49 passes without picking up any additional passengers. The passengers are angry.

Crooked Teeth man: Are you a natural blonde?

Blonde girl (with very visible dark brown roots): No, I dye it.

Crooked Teeth man: Why do you do that?

Blonde girl: I like it like that.

The bus begins to move. The world is back to its normal state of affairs.

Girl 1: Do you know all the state capitals?

Girl 2: No, do you?

Girl 1: No.